I never intended to go to university.
I only enrolled in the course to keep my parents happy.
Secretly, I planned to run away.
To never see anyone I knew ever again.
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| Sometimes when walking home, I felt the urge to turn around and never come back. |
But would I be able to get a job? If I became homeless, would society help me, or would I be left to die of hunger? I figured I may as well go to university until I had planned everything out properly.
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| I’m the kind of person who has to pick the logical choice over the emotional one. |
After doing my internship placement, for the first time in my life I had a substantial amount of money ($30,000). This was the chance I had been waiting for. Even though I disliked my parents, they did take good care of me, so I figured I owed it to them to at least let them know that I was leaving.
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| Awkward. |
They didn’t understand. My dad told me to "think with your head" and wanted me to wait until I graduate.
I was so close to leaving. I looked at airfares to the next state. I printed a map of the city and highlighted housing, libraries and public transport. But my dad was right, I had to finish my university degree, especially now that I was already half way though my degree.
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| Shattered dreams. |
I've finally graduated now. But I'm still living at home. I'm planning to start a PhD.
Why? Because I’ve realized that the problem isn't just with my parents. The problem is with the entire developed world. The level of poverty in the world is ridiculous. Rich countries squirm out of committing their 0.7% to help the developing world. 6 million people die each year from preventable diseases, and the media doesn’t seem to care.
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| Drowning Child Analogy from The Life You Can Save. |
I’ve given up hope of my own happiness. I’ve accepted that I’ll probably be full of a deep hatred for the rest of my life. But that doesn’t matter anymore. When people are drowning, it’s no time to build sandcastles on the beach. People are suffering, and I’ll do whatever it takes to help them. And I’ll squeeze society for every every last drop of help I can get. Even if that means I have to live with my parents for a little longer.
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| Chill out. |