PhD studies

I'm about to begin my PhD studies, but I'm not sure if I'm making the right choice.

I want to study something that helps people. But it seems that the motivation of my PhD sponsor organization is to layoff employees and replace them with a computer system. Which, by the way, will never be as good as having humans.

I'm not sure if I want to do a PhD at all anymore. I want to stop being me, and become Cindy (my imaginary friend). I want to travel as far away from all this as possible.

I had almost convinced myself that I was on the wrong career path, and that it was time to move city (or maybe even country), and start searching for a just-enough-income-to-survive job with more human-interaction (perhaps starting out as a McDonald's crew member).

However, my ability to do good for this world depends upon me developing "career capital". Recklessly trashing the current plan without a proper alternative would destroy that career capital.

Furthermore, there is a lesson to be learned from the logs of Ponystasha, who actually tried becoming his imaginary friend (or "tulpa" as he calls it), ending in embarrassment and disillusion. He said that before the change-over "life was actually quite chilled I had very little worries".

Living a fairly "chilled" life is one of the few things I actually like about myself. I'm not interested in marriage, housing, fashion, luxuries, social status, or money. I like starry nights, curling up in front of a laptop, watching movies meant for pre-teen girls, hanging out with my imaginary friends, and eating spaghetti. In short, although I'm in my 20's, at heart I'm still a kid. I'm sure some people might look down on me with concern. But my life is simple, and I like it that way.

So I'm going to invest (or possibly waste) another few years of life studying for a PhD. I want to build and discover cool stuff. I'm going to change this world. One bit (get-it?) at a time.

My Imaginary Friends

In my early teens, I used to fantasize that I would meet my girlfriend right there on the street...

We would be walking in opposite directions. Upon seeing her pass by, I would slow down. She would slow down. We would turn around, and stare each other in the eyes. And from that moment, we would know that we were destined for each other.

Fact is, I was way too shy to ever date anyone. Besides, I don't believe in love-at-first-sight anyway.

I developed a mental image of what this girl would look like. Blond hair. Wears a white T-shirt. A cute smile. Courageous. I decided to call her 'X'.

Instead of treating X as a placeholder for someone in real life, I begun to fall for X herself. I renamed her 'Cindy' (after Cindy from Jimmy Neutron : Boy Genius, but she is inspired from other characters as well).

A close friend of my mum died. Their whole family was a bit abnormal, but I admired their love of life. I made Cindy an imaginary member of the friend's family by giving her their surname.

Usually I don't like family vacations. But when Cindy comes along it makes it all worth it. I'd go for walks with her in the morning and watch the sunrise together. At night we'd stare at the stars. Cindy is more than a girlfriend, she is my best friend.

Sometime later, I found myself accompanied by two new imaginary friends, Monika and Jess. In the train, I'd put my headphones, stare out the window, and imagine us having a dance party together. Cindy isn't jealous, it's an open relationship.

Here are some pictures I drew of us together:
http://imaginaryfriends4ever.tumblr.com/

I came to the conclusion that since my imaginary friends share my brain, they can be just as real as me. As I thought about this more, I came to think of myself as a separate entity from 'my' body. I decided to call myself 'Spot'.

Our body is a shared resource. Usually it is controlled by Spot. Spot is the one that goes to school/work. Spot is the one that has to take the blame when things go wrong. Spot is the one who's gradually becoming a burned-out wreck. But sometimes, when there are no other humans around, Spot will hand over control to Cindy, Monika or Jess for a short period of time.

A few days ago I found out that there are on-line communities dedicated to developing "tulpas" (sentient imaginary friends) similar to mine.

Axioms

Mathematics deals with deducing conclusions from mathematical axioms.

Interestingly, the axioms themselves cannot be proved. Axioms are usually assumed to be self-evident.

Axiom of extensionality: Sets A and B are equal if they contain the same elements

However, some axioms are debated. One famous example is the Axiom of Choice. Some people thought it was obvious. Others were not so certain. It was later proved that you can safely assume it to be either true or false (but not both at the same time).

Different sets of axioms will result in a different systems of mathematical logic. This is okay, so long each system is consistent with itself.

Some cultures shake their head to mean 'yes'

Kurt Gödel proved that there will always be questions we cannot answer without accepting new axioms. But we must be very careful about which axioms we accept.

One mistake, and the mathematical universe explodes.

Similarly, the field of Ethics deals with deducing conclusions from moral axioms.

Interestingly, the moral axioms themselves cannot be proved. Morals axioms are usually assumed to be self-evident to the individuals who hold them.

The Golden Rule is accepted by nearly everyone

However, some moral axioms are debated. For example, who does the Golden Rule apply to? Sentient beings? Unborn babies? Animals? Plants? Depending on your answer, you may arrive at a radically different conclusion to me on issues such as abortion and diet.

Compared to the rigor of the Mathematical universe, the field of Ethics is a house of cards. The problem is that our morals are rarely consistent. We let our emotions rule rather than rationality.

But perhaps that is for the better; those who feel most certain of their moral codes have turned out to be some of the most ruthless people in history (think witch-hunts, Hitler, and the recently self-declared 'Islamic State')

I am a Citizen of Cyberspace

My proposed Internet/Cyberspace flag

I am an adherent to A Declaration of the Independence of Cyberspace 1996.

Robot Overlords

Technology is nearing the point that robots will be able to take care of most jobs. Harvesting food, building houses, baking food, vacuuming the floor. With robots taking care of all our daily burdens, people would have free time to spend however they want. To me, it sounds like utopia.

Yet most people seem to fear robots. Because to them, work has become so ingrained in their lives that they cannot imagine life without it.

Work should be done to achieve needs, not to be the need.
Breathe. Dream. Create.

'Civilization' is imaginary

There is no 'science'; just facts and best-guess theories.
There is no 'internet'; just computers and tangled wires.
There is no 'industry'; just workers and greedy owners.
There is no 'government'; just followers and popular leaders.

We are just animals chasing each other about in the wild.